Currently, access to the Internet and all kinds of videos and information has become one of the easiest routines of our daily lives, and with it, access to porn. Anyone with a smartphone, an electronic device that almost everyone has got, and from an increasingly younger age, can access pornographic material with a single click.
Obviously, this scares us in terms of not being able to protect adolescents. What is it that really worries us that our sons and daughters can watch pornography, what are the consequences? Can we prevent them from doing so, and, if they do, can we counteract it, how can we do so?
To make matters worse, the pandemic has not helped to reduce pornography consumption. Precisely, according to a study published in Journal of Behavioral Addictions, multiple countries, one of the most visited websites with this type of content, increased the number of visits by 11% between February and March 2020, that is, during the first month of confinement in Spain.
Consequences of watching porn in adolescence
Some of the consequences of pornography consumption that several studies have pointed out are:
1. It generates addiction
We already talked about this in another article, but we would like to emphasize it again, since the brain of an adolescent is still developing. And not only at the neurological level. What is not yet fully developed in an adolescent is his or her psychosexuality and, with it, the lack of judgment to discern between what is fact and what is fiction.
2. It generates a very rigid and distorted vision of gender roles
Most porn is designed for the satisfaction of men, so women are presented in a submissive role, implying that this is what men like, when it does not have to be so. This can cause young men and women to adopt roles in their adulthood and in their future erotic encounters without having experienced enough to know if they are comfortable in them or not.
3. It harms their relationships
Together with a very rigid view of gender roles, this can in turn lead to difficulties in their relationships, both socio-affective and sexual. This leads to very unhealthy behaviors. When viewing pornographic material, they are exposed to very strong stimuli, so when they are having a real erotic encounter they do not feel the same with another person, which causes feelings of frustration and anxiety.
What can parents and other educators do?
The first and most important thing is to eliminate the taboo of talking about sex with sons, daughters, students, pupils, etc. For this we gave some keys in others articles. However, the educational work also takes place at school, high school and other areas where adolescents develop, such as sports and other extracurricular activities.
Here we give some advices to counteract the inadequate education provided by porn:
1. Talk naturally about sex
You can teach them to be critical of what they see, but what is clear is that this will not happen if you do not talk about it. Besides, if adults talk to them about sex, it will surely make them feel confident enough to ask any questions or whatever it is that worries them, and it will prevent them from consulting the wide world of the Internet and jump into pornographic web pages.
2. Instill that pornography is fiction and not reality
Just as you teach them that superheroes, witches and dragons are not real, that they are part of fiction and are meant to entertain, you should do the same with porn. It may be very exciting, but it does not represent reality. Not only that, but it also represents a very sexist reality.
3. Show them more educational material
Believe it or not, there is a lot of material on the Internet that we can also access that is tremendously educational. From documentaries, to books, to movies and series (one of the best known, Sex Education, from Netflix). Review all this material beforehand and decide whether or not it meets equality criteria.
We hope these tips have been useful and that they go beyond installing parental controls on your devices. Remember that silences also educate and if there is silence, young people will go to satisfy their curiosity to other sources that are not the most reliable.
By UPAD Psicología y Coaching